pathofvigilante | DUPLICITY IC INBOX

Hey! I have some good news I wanted you to be the first to know.
It's official I've been adopted. I have a dad now!
Guess who it is!

Oh, hey you! =D That's great! I'm happy for you, for real! Being in a family... it's the best until it falls apart You're lucky no matter who it is It's a big deal when someone promises to look after you no matter what Aw man, I think I'm getting a little jealous over here! Heeheeheehee 😛😛😛😛😛

Thanks! I'm excited to see what all this family stuff is about.

Ok I'll tell you. It's Alfred!

make sure your careful friends and family have the easiest access to stab you in the back Not that it's always like that... but sometimes things unexpectedly go BOOM Oh! It's good ol' Al? Then you're probably fine. Aww, what a papa bear!

The only thing I'm concerned about with him is that he'll get himself arrested again.

Hello! Are you missing a very good and handsome boy named Bruce? This is the number I found on his collar! Are you his parent and/or guardian? He's very into my take out right now and I just don't have the heart to take it away from him [ John attaches a picture of Bruce The Hyena, who is currently chowing down the innards of a few take out containers. Looks like... Tacos? Mexican Food? Finding the old abandoned funhouse had been an attempt to grasp something familiar in this odd reflection of the Gotham he knows. Last thing he expected to find was a hungry Hyena that felt entitled to his (probably stolen) dinner. ]

[ Harley had only turned her back for a moment when something shiny caught her eye, but apparently, that was enough time for Bruce to not only get out of sight, but to raid someone else's takeout. Oh joy, it was Mexican food at that. Great, just great! Looked like the piglet was sleeping on the couch tonight. As hands searched her pockets and cleavage for some cash to pay for this good samaritan's lost takeout, she voice to texted them back... ]

Oh my gawd, I'm so sorry! I'll pay for everything. It hadn't been that long since he ate, so if he gave ya' the starvin' puppy eyes, he's an excellent liar like that.

[ Wonder who had taught him that... ]

I'm near the funhouse, where are you and I'll come find ya'!

[John almost fumbles his dear fuchsia phone when it chimes again so soon-- he had been trying to get another couple shot of that cute taco-smeared snout.]

That was fast! So happy YOU'RE not actually shot dead in an alley somewhere hahaha! =D [Because that's the story of the Original Wayne Parental Units that every Gothamite knows.]

He didn't get far! I'm on the far east side of the property =) And don't worry about it, I didn't pay for the food ;)

[His gaze ghosts the Familiar-Yet-Off scenery; and his blistering grin loses a tiny bit of wattage until Hyena Bruce gets his nose snuck in a little plastic cup of queso. Then a strikingly exuberant cackle hits the air. A pic of Bruce's predicament is next to pop up in Harley's messages.]

PLEASE don't tell me you let him attend those Rich Guy Galas like this. The press would DESTROY him! 🤣😂🤣😂

[ At the next text, Harley was so worried about her beloved pet and the impending doom that was brewing in his stomach, that the Bruce Wayne reference flew right over her head for the moment, causing brows to knit together in suspicion. Well, in addition to the exorbitant cache of weapons hidden all along her body, she was also sporting her favorite giant hammer on her back, so she wasn't worried in the least. ]

Yeah, um, me too, hon. Me too. Alright, headin' over. I'm wearin' black and red leather pants, corset, and mini jacket. Ya' can't miss me if ya' tried. 😋

[ As she walked along, Harley couldn't help the big grin that spread across her lips at the next picture they sent. ]

Eh, the paparazzi don't bother me no more. Not ever since The Incident™. Hah! 🤪

[ Wanting to make an entrance, Harley began performing expertly executed cartwheels as she approached the east side, with normal and even some hands-free ones just to really show off. ]

[It was a really off color joke, Harley; don't worry about it. Not the kind of thing a Normal Person(TM) would fling out as A Funny, but then, this guy is about as far from Normal as one can get.

There had been a vague feeling of familiarity growing at the back of his mind; nothing that warranted any real attention until stacked next to that extremely familiar sounding outfit. His Harley's extremely iconic look. Are his hands sweating a little? Nope, nope, everything is fine.]

Oh I had no idea this party had such a flashy dresscode! Stepping up with some of my favorite colors there stranger ;) You won't miss me either. Look out for a silk turquoise argyle shirt with a purple vest! If Gotham's Favorite Son Fluff isn't enough, hahahaha!

[He's curious about what kind of Incident could have gone down, always a chaos loving clown, but that strange stomach-fluttering familiarity is starting to distract him. His ears start to track the click-swoosh-clack of her cartwheels from across the way, and he is the first to spot her appraching.

John shoots to his feet. His face feels hot though his bleached skin can't show a hint of color. That's not--It can't be--but is it? The way the Stranger-Not-Stranger moves is far too familiar, coupled with her style, her words, her energy.... No, this isn't his Harley, but this isn't his Gotham, either. But it is Gotham, and she... she must be Harley Quinn.

Okay, now his hands are sweating. He stands completely frozen, both wanting to bolt in the other direction, and fling himself at her feet. Harley... but a version he never betrayed. His extremely brilliant mind races in useless circles; he ends up standing stiff as a board as she approaches, a blistering but subtly nervous grin barring his teeth as a cartwheel lands her only a couple short feet away from him.]

Harley? [Shock, surprise, confusion, fear and adoration all war in the muddy pair of syllables. He looks like he's preparing to duck a punch as much as refraining himself from falling into place at her side.] Is that, uh... Geez, you're different, but... it's you, isn't it? You're really Harley Quinn

HEY if I stole this phone is not the main issue here! And I bet YOU are thinking of THAT OTHER GUY. The other, ~other~ me. Not to be confused with The Other Me, right? You get it. ~I~ never tried to kill you. We did fight-- you hit me with an electric hammer. I could tell you the whole story, if you want. ... Over tacos maybe?~

Other, other you? How many of you can there possibly be?

You dumped me, kicked me out, no..threw me out, I had half of Gotham trying to kill me besides you. I had to go to work for Amanda Waller or have my head go splat like a hamster in a microwave.

I've just gotten my feet under me now and you show up sayin you ain't you?

...you buyin' the tacos?

Gee I dunno, how big is the multiverse? From what I understand, there's a lot of different yous, and mes, and Batmans, and Catladies and so on! As for how many of me are here right now, uh... That... that would be two, I think. Me, John, and that... that other guy. But don't go spreading that around, okay? I don't want people to think I'm ~crazy~ Yeesh, that's... that's a really bad time. And kinda different then what happened to me, but also kinda the same. BUYING is a bit... liberal. I am GETTING tacos. And queso. And Carne Asada. You know, the basics~

Nope. Too big, not even going to think about that.

If, and that's a big if, I agree to this, you gotta promise no killing, maiming or threatin to kill or maim me.

Ohhh god, I can almost taste the jalapenos. Where are we meeting?

It's a huge headache, right? SO crazy! BUT it means even though I'm lost in this Gotham, I still know who to look for. My ~people~. That's you. I can tell, I can feel it. If you meet me, maybe you'll feel it too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got a BABY kill count. Which means that it's small-- NOT that I kill babies! I'd never, EVER want to hurt you, Harley. Not in any way you didn't really, really want me to 😈 My Best Buddy really hates the whole unaliving thing though, so I'm trying not to do that. Again. Well I haven't exactly wrangled an apartment yet. Know any good abandoned fun houses around? Nothing worse than cold queso!

Best Buddy? Who you making friends with that doesn't like killin? Everybody I knew you with before was colorfully psychotic.

Good to hear about the babies though, I recently met this kid I kinda took a shine to, sort of took her under my wing, like a mini me. Except she's Asian.

I've kinda been using The Booby Trap over at Amusement Mile when I needed clandestine clown activities. Still has some good places to sit and Bruce likes running around peeing on those old topieries.

Oh he's DEFINATELY colorfully psychotic-- that's why we're such good friends! And it's Batman! Gotta find the one that's kicking around here but that's a LATER thing. You've got my full and undivided attention, Harley 💞💞💞 Okay well I'm definitely not gunna stab a little Asian you, cross my heart! Oh sure, I know that place! I can be there in 15. Grappling hook is way faster than the bus. And uh... I'm ASSUMING you don't mean that sexy gothamite playboy guy? Unless there's some real KINK happening here?

You're friends with the bat? That does not make sense. I mean given the time he's tried to put you and me away, and nearly killed us and broken up or gang and ruined anything we've done.

Unless your Batman is batty as his name, if things really are different there I guess that could be.

That's who I named him after! Brucie is my sweet little baby! My hyena, the sweetest thing. He is just the cutest.

But I think I should leave him at home, we've had some long conversation about me and my Puddin and how things went and he's very sensitive about it all, he might not take it well.

For the record I can say he is ABSOLUTELY as batty as his name, Harls. He ~saved~ me, when I was trying really hard to KILL him and also his lying AWFUL friends. I dunno what would have happened to me if I hit that acid but he caught me, mid-fall. I'm telling you, some stuff is Different. Some stuff is The same. Hence, Tacos. Reality Bending stories go down way better with Mexican I'm just saying. Also, you have a HYENA named BRUCE? I NEED PICTURES RIGHT NOW. DOES HE WANT AN EXTRA SERVING OF BEEF BECAUSE I WILL GO BACK FOR IT.

[ Puddin'. He can't actually blush, but his face sure feels hot now. His hands are clammy now? Better not drop his phone... ]

Oh. Well, sure. If you want. He's your sweetest baby. But we AT LEAST have to save him leftovers?

You'll have to tell me all about it, sounds like a real trip.

Science and reality over tacos, sounds about right. I practically fought off an entire gang for an egg sandwich once.

I'll show you pics when I get there, driving with my knee and texting, adding pics might be pushing my luck.

He'd love the leftovers though, he eats anything. He really likes greeks though.

ETA 7ish minutes

[ Yeah, she said greeks, not greek... don't ask. ]

It'll be just like the Good ol' days in Arkham... Uh, not sure if you had those. I did. I remember being in such a dark place, but you were there to pull me out, give me a reason to live outside those padded walls... I didn't even want to try before I met you. HAhahahaha! Only a damn idiot gets between Harley Quinn and something she wants to get her teeth into. That's just science. Common Sense. And okay, okay, we'll do pic sharing! It's on the agenda, officially! So you try not to crash and I will try not to fling myself off a building.

[ He did say grapping hook, remember? ]

Greeks. Got it. I'll make a mental note. Swing by the morgue next time. Not like anyone there can get any deader. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle as they say! ETA 13 minutes!

Sure did, I used to work there. On staff that's where I met you...other you.

Anyway, pulling up now so just meet me by the clown nose.

[ Harl parked her car when spent a good thirty seconds wringing her fingers in a grip around the steering wheel. Why had she agreed to this? Joker was bad news, maybe this was just a ploy to get her back. Or maybe this was a ploy to get her dead.

She was 67% sure she was having a heart attack or a panic attack, or maybe it was gas from the coney dog with extra onions that she had for breakfast, but something was causing her distress and she was pretty sure it had something to do with the clown she'd agreed to meet with against all logic and better judgement.

Maybe he was different, her Puddin had never talked to her that way, he'd never offered that kind of kindness before. Hell, his love language usually ended in bruises.

She needed to be smart about this. Whatever else, she had to be smart. So she grabbed a gun from the glove compartment...heh who the fuck keeps gloves in there anyway? and a mallet for good measure. The former tucked into the back of her jorts and the latter balanced on her shoulder as she strolled over to the big red nose of the clown that marked the Bobby Trap side door. ]

[ Now he's excited-- and it's making him increasingly reckless, swinging at faster-than-break-neck speeds on the hissing reel of his grappling hook from one rooftop to the next. His not in full costume; no red lips or black-circled eyes, but this copy of Gotham saw fit to manifest him here in his purple leather duster, pockets lined with some of his 'super hero' toys.

So here he is, dressed to Not Kill. The manic, corrosive laughter bubbles in his chest like something rotten as he sails through the air, landing in a lanky limbed crouch on a sturdy streetlight just doing its best in terrible circumstances.

From afar, he watches her-- his quite his Harley Quinn emerge restlessly from her car and suddenly gravity feels like a lame suggestion. Whoever his Harley is, certainly did a number on him.

Suddenly a snapping set of fanged dentures comes ripping through the air and sinks a hungry bight into that giant ornamental clown nose. Behind it follows the reel of Joker's grappling gun, and the sound of his own blisteringly gleeful giggles; he lands neatly top the big red nose (steals a moment to drop the take out bags there because he does not want to spill the food!) and then rolls down the other side, boneless, like a rag-doll but with a grounding grip on his gun.

And then he hangs there, smiling with a strange toxic potion of charm, glee, and softly simmering obsession. He doesn't blink, but holds an odd and almost theatrical pose with one knee bent; The Hanged Man, if she happens to know the archetype. ]

Wow, you're really here! I mean, of course you are but-- you didn't have to be. Don't gotta be a criminal mastermind to know things between us sometimes get... complicated. But you came, and you're here and despite everything, it's good, like so good to see you!

[ He holds out his (upside down) hand to shake, all eager and teeth-barring smiles. ]

I'm John. John Doe.

[ Points for eccentricity, not like she was unused to that. Everyone she knew was crazy to one degree or another. You hang around in the nuts house long enough and you just start to become a magnet for it, she was used to that. Still, this was a bit more theatrical than the Jman she was used to.

She skittered back when he landed...hung? Looking all trussed up like one of them tarot cards. What was that one? Oh right, sacrifice. Did that mean him or her? Or her reading into it? Christ, she knew what this was, this was obsessive intrusive thoughts, and they were running her into the ground.

Harley slipped the mallet off her shoulder, bounced off the platform heel of her boot and let it lean against the red nose. ]

Yeah, well I said I would be so here I am.

[ She took the inverted hand, awkwardly twisting to get a look at a face that was familiar and not at the same time. Pale skin, big eyes, wide insane smile. Yeah that's Mister J, but not the one she knew. ]

So you're Joker, but not my Joker. A Joker. And you know a Harley, too?

[ She was still trying to figure that one out. She hadn't run into any other versions of her or him before. What did that mean? There were other Batmen too apparently. ]

I never heard him called John before.

[ John gets weird (sorry, weirder) when he's excited-- and his heart is certainly hammering. This is like... the ultimate Do Over! Yeah, his Harley might be ready to kill him a little bit... but he never hurt this one. And she never hurt him. So many shiny New Possibilities.

Reading into every little movement might be obsessive but it's also extremely wise; John can be fawning and awkward, might seem less dangerous-- but he is by no means the totality of this man's personality. But this Hanged Man in particular means to hint inversion, and a reserved point of few.

Or maybe his leg is just tired from vaulting so many rooftops, who knows?~

In any case, he doesn't seem the least bit bothered by the fact that Harley is very obviously armed. That's just good sense, in any version of Gotham. A few quick and fluid motions place the peculiar man on his feet, and then send a quick shot from his grappling gun to hook and fetch his back-pack and bring it zipping back to him. ]

Joker is my 'Hero Name'. More than that, but it's not really good Pre-Taco Talk, is it? Don't want our food to get soggy.

[ He grins, not unlike an eager little Cerberus (because he's way too dangerous to be a puppy) and wiggles the plastic take out bags before her. ]

Soooo... you show me inside, and I'll start talking? About my Harley, if you want. Or anything, really. You can always ask me anything, you know. Anything you want.

[ In the space of a few sentences his aura seems to morph and shift, seeming at moments not too unlike Harley herself, with interspersed whispers of something so terribly similar to the Joker she knew. ]

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locked to igetcrazy [text]

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for quinnofdiamonds

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i'm cool switching to actionspam whenever if ya fancy <3

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